photo: http://www.decorativecountryliving.com/Layettes, exersaucers, Baby Bjorns, slings, nursing pillows, Jolly Jumpers...mere acoutrements to babyhood, but they have actually become household names!! All are lovely baby accessories, but are they really necessary? Do they just make life easier and could we get along without any of them?
Many years ago, a woman had a child, put it to her breast, diapered it in cloth diapers with large diaper pins, put it in a sleeper or night shirt and laid it in a crib or her own bed. Nobody had baby monitors, black and white imagery attached to the crib to stimulate its brain and visual development, or doctor recommended foam supports to keep baby on his/her back. Prams or strollers were handed down through generations and were basic at best. There were no clips for baby's pacifier, no cup holders for mother's Starbucks coffee, or age-appropriate stroller toy. There was certainly no snack cup for baby's cheerios or sippy cup. Nope... instead, mother handed baby a teething biscuit and was lucky if there was any sort of seat belt to keep baby secure. When baby travelled in the car, she sat on mother's lap (with no seatbelt) and even sometimes breathed in father's second-hand smoke!! {{shudder}}If baby was not breastfed, (and if she was born in my generation, she likely was not) she may have been fed a mixture of Carnation's canned milk with a dose of vitamins added. More affluent mothers fed their babies the newer formulas on the market and those mother's that did nurse, certainly did not do so in public. Baby seemed content despite the lack of age-appropriate accessories.
Fast forward to now, and the entire baby accessory market has virtually exploded. There are portable covers for the shopping cart handle, convertible cribs, carseats, highchairs and strollers. Baby can even be monitored by video cams designed to allow the anxious parent to count every one of baby's breaths. There are designer baby clothes, bedding, baby carriers, quality educational toys, Baby Einstein (huh?) and even websites devoted to the sale of super-luxe baby clothes and accessories. Mother has almost become judged as much for her baby's fashion sense, as for her parenting style and values.
Where once, baby shared a corner of her parent's or sibling's rooms, she now has a full-size nursery decorated in either pastel, soothing colours for the Traditionalists among us, or in brighter, stimulating colours designed by parents who want their children to have the proper stimulation and early start to learning. But what does baby really need?? What does she need to be comfortable, safe, and happy?
Here is my pared down (sensible) top ten list. Keep in mind, baby could technically live without a few of these things, while a few more could be added (like a highchair or pacifier), depending on your own baby's "needs":
1. nourishment...While I'm not going to espouse my personal beliefs on infant nutrition, as a former nurse, I do know that babies need to have something a little better than Carnation sweetened condensed milk with Tri-vi-sol added. I nursed my own babies and enjoyed every minute (well once we got past the iniitial learning curve!). Feeding a baby, breast or bottle, is one of the most cozy, enjoyable experiences a mother will ever experience. One of the best parts...I believe. I will never, ever forget the sweet way my baby would stop drinking (but not let go!) and smile sweetly at me when I would coo or sing to them (as I always did) while nursing. And then I would take my turn: gobbling up their little cheeks and necks. Honestly, I never could understand when mothers didn't devour their kids like I did. How do they resist??
Babies are delicious.
2. diapers...(unless you believe in early infant toilet-training)...I used disposable but I strongly admire women like my sister who used cloth and I wish I could have had more ambition in that regard. Either way, keep them dry and to help keep them diaper rash free, forgo the wipes. They are expensive, bad for the environment and alcohol free or not, they are still not as good as plain old warm water on a soft washcloth on baby's soft little bottom. Oh, and you don't need to buy the expensive diaper creams either. Although I loved Penaten and Desitin, when my budget was tight I used good, old Ihle's Paste. It is sold in the pharmacy and has oodles more zinc the the leading zinc brands...for a fraction of the cost.
3.Somewhere to sleep... Again, I will not get into the family bed vs. crib debate. I did both...baby would start out in his perfect crib in his beautiful room, and then end up in with us all cuddled up and nursing. Two of my children had serious sleep issues, so this made perfect sense for an exhausted mother like me! I have never regretted a moment spent sleeping with them snuggled up to me.
4. A pram or stroller...I am a serious stroller girl! I will never forget my first stroller for my eldest baby. It was a Peg Perego stroller in navy fabric with cherries and cursive alphabet letters on it. I set it up before my baby was born and would just sit and stare at it...dreaming of pushing my little angel in it. Sadly, my first-born hated being in it, and my precious stroller had to wait to see good use by my second child...
photo: twilitetmoon.com5. A front/back carrier and/or Snugli/Baby Bjorn/sling (or reasonable facsimile)... My babies loved to be carried so I especially loved the back carrier as I could have my hands free and get my "chores" done. As long as I could put up with baby pulling the tiny hairs on the back of my neck, I was alright!!
6. exersaucer...I will never forget the freedom my very first exersaucer brought to my life. Finally I could put my first-born down and he was happy!! I still remember the sweet way my babies would spin around in the seat looking for the cheerios scattered on the tray. I loved that thing...I know it can't truly be labelled a necessity, but it really is. If you like your sanity...
7. carseat...this should be right up there with infant nutrition and diapers!! I obsessed over carseats!! I always made sure it was installed perfectly...locking clip applied to seatbelt, seat tilted at just the right angle, and later: installed using the tether and anchor that made it be securely fastened to the car. No sway or slippage for my babies!! I am just as diligent with the use of booster seats. I never wanted to have that guilt on my plate...if I used it according to the exact Transport Canada guidelines, then I was doing all I could to ensure their safety while they were in the car. Oh yeah, and you have to drive safely, too!!!
8. nursing pillow...I know this is really not a necessity for many; but in my case, it was a lifesaver as it made nursing so much more comfortable and provided a spot for me to prop a book or magazine for some "me time" while feeding my babies.
9. a comfy chair...to rock baby, read a book to her, feed her, and keep her upright and still catch a few winks when she has an ear infection.
Which leads to number ten...
10. A welcoming lap and a good set of arms for cuddling... Hold your baby as much as you possibly can. A time will come when they are too busy discovering to crawl up and snuggle for too long...and eventually they will just get too big to rock and bounce on your lap. Enjoy your baby, for as the saying goes, babies don't keep...
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